How To Know If A Butch Likes You 2

Due to popular demand, right out of the mouths and emails from friends, acquaintances, and perfect strangers, here is how a butch or stone butch lets a femme know she is into her:

– Making eye contact OR not making eye contact

– Smiling a lot when she is around her

– Introducing herself to the femme if they don’t know each other yet

– Staying nearby and sneak peeking at the femme OR staying in the background and observing her from a distance

– Complimenting her without making it too obvious

– Touching her in a non sexual way – something small and almost unnoticeable like touching her arm, holding her hand, touching her hair when you help her take off or put her coat back on.

– Listening to what she says and making sure the femme knows she’s paying attention

– Telling a few jokes to find out if the femme enjoys her company and sense of humor

– Finding out her favorite mode of communication (chat, text, call, Skype) because she plans to communicate via that mode

– “Just because” text messages and phone calls

– Burning her a CD or downloading a playlist to her iPod

– Interacting with her friends to find out where the femme will be – this specific butch said she wants to know everything about a femme and everywhere she is going which, mmm, is kind of borderline stalking in my book.

– Asking one of the femme’s friends if she thinks the femme is into her – I do not recommend doing this for two reasons: (a) the femme’s friend may like the butch for herself or may not even be a real friend (b) the femme may not want to be with a butch who acts as if she were in high school (i.e. grow some balls!).

– Finding out common hobbies or pastimes so that she can plan ahead and ask the femme out on a date

– Making plans to go somewhere – something casual like a coffee date – to get to know her a little better before asking her out on a date (and that’s where this other butch lost me!)

– Making plans to go out with a group of butches and femmes so that she can observe the femme without the pressure of being on an official date

– Being extra careful to make sure she never embarrasses the femme in front of her friends, relatives or colleagues.

– Buying her drinks or dinner, flowers, or something she mentioned to show her she was paying attention

– Flirting openly

Which brings me (us?) back to square one: not knowing if a butch is into me unless she says so. I can’t know for sure if a butch likes-likes me unless she opens her mouth because most of my friends do all of the above and – to my knowledge – none of them wants to get in my pants.

If you enjoyed this post, please share it so other folks can see it, too.
If you think A Femme in NYC is kind of cool, you can easily stay informed by signing up to receive an email notification each time I post a new blog entry. Just type your email address in the “Email Subscription” box and click “Sign me up!”
If you think I’m cool, please click here to make a donation and help me achieve my life dream of being a kept femme.

5 thoughts on “How To Know If A Butch Likes You 2

  1. If you see me at the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival and you smile at me and I proceed to hide in the Porta-Jane for the rest of Festival, that means I think you are attractive.

  2. @barbaraRyan.. haha sooo true!! Just freaking come out and say if you are into us or not! idk that i would consider myself a femme but I like butch girls.. so this caught my eye! 🙂 thanks Maria!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.